ugly as...naked

there is a writer
beside
a naked bulb


every word
is not discarded
or thrown away
as rubbish


for they hold
ideas
moments
of
genius


oh for a naked bulb
an empty rubbish bin
and 
courage


yes please

ugly as...squandering your life...

i have squandered my money
i have squandered my love
i have squandered my time
i have squandered my energy
i have squandered my trust...


squander: to spend or use extravagantly or wastefully, to dissipate, to cause to disperse, to lose an opportunity


dissipate: intemperate in the pursuit of pleasure


disperse: to drive off or scatter


intemperate:  having or showing a lack of self-control


extravagant: lacking in moderate balance and restraint


all in the pursuit of happiness...


sometimes you have to see it in black and white to get it




                   
                   

ugly as...repetitiveness

if we all sat down
and wrote a book
about our lives
i wonder how different
our stories would be?


i wonder if the important stuff
would differ greatly
or
would we all
just spit out
exactly the same stuff


i think it's amazing
how many times
i repeat things
but maybe
it's so i'll
remember
not 
to 
forget

ugly as...school heaters

my $1 trademe bargain memory maker

...remember the days
    warming your hands
    burning your stockings
    drying your socks
    these were the best reasons
            for going to school
    

ugly as...not even

on a grey gloomy tauranga day...
i stayed in my dressing gown...
and the thought of laziness
crossed my mind...
so did the thought of wastefulness...


but humbug...


so i used my time
to take photos
of home...


and it amazes me
how beautiful things look








maybe that's how magazines do it

just- maybe not
in their dressing gowns

                                          

ugly as...risking humiliation

...vessels...

...naked we came in
       & (apparently)
...naked we go out


...and the in between time
   we spend
   clothing ourselves


...in everything
   
...but splendour


                       what idiots

ugly as...realising that maybe money does get in the way

...maybe
   like bubble glass
   which obscures
   your view


...money
   obscures
   your view
   




...and your potential
                             is actually hidden on the other side


...where potentially you may have nothing
...but
...your potential


                                 ...woah...!

ugly as...my most jealous lover

I lay in bed last night, wondering why

He abandons me

I always thought...

if He abandon's me...

then I have nothing...

nothing...

nothing of worth...

and I realised I was right

He

has been leading me here

all along

He was my most jealous lover

He has always been

my most jealous lover

His love is 

the most jealous

of all the loves

I have had

His jealous love

has walled me in

His jealous love

has barricaded my doors

His jealous love 

destroys his enemies

before me

His jealous love

makes fools of my other lovers

for my eyes to see

His jealous love

roars through the heavens...

'she is mine, she is mine, she is mine'

His jealous love

will not 

let another

have me

His jealous love had not abandoned me

His love had chosen me

Me

And before I went to sleep

I realised how blessed I was

I had been chosen

to be loved by

Him

and

I realised

 He will not let a thing

stand in His way

Not one thing!

His jealous love

guards me

His jealous love

covers me

His jealous love

sustains me

His jealous love

uplifts me

His jealous love

is long suffering

His jealous love

is the love

I 

have longed for

He is my most jealous lover

and now i know

that they will not find me

with out first

coming through Him

I am not abandoned... He is with me always...

He is my most jealous lover

Amen

ugly as...oooh look, snap...ish

oooh...elephant measuring cups


and look....what i have sitting in my kitchen since the day i found them...many months ago...

great minds...or just great finds...
i got these at a second-hand shop
for $3...
which also came with...

plant holder
(basil plant struggling through winter)

salt holder which is perfect for tooth picks

...it seems we really don't need multi million dollar corporations dominating what we like...
                    ...we may possibly be able to 
                                       ...trust our own hearts...

ugly as...sensing freedom is just around the corner

     ...how long, and how tearful
  have i been...
knowing that i have come to the end of myself...
and all that i thought i had to be...
and all that i realised i was never going to be...
and all the broken dreams that i hung on to for way too long
and all of the me that i believed, was so ugly...
and God gave me a trick question...
He said...do you trust me?